The Love Of Your Life Only Comes After The Mistake Of Your Life
“Maybe our mistakes are what make our fate.” ~ Carrie Bradshaw
Maybe it’s true that we need to first become broken, before we can finally become whole.
A love that is painful is the worst kind of heartbreak. You know the one…you had such high hopes, it was the one you risked everything for—only to find it was a bet that you could never win.
So we break into a billion tiny pieces of ourselves and contemplate how we could have gotten it so wrong.
We all make mistakes when it comes to love.
We choose our partners based on the lessons that our souls need to learn. And we do this without realizing that it is normally those painful lessons we need to go through the most.
We can’t be transformed through an easy life nd we can’t have our minds expanded by the mundane. Rather, it only happens when we are left with only ourselves and our regrets.
Perhaps there’s no such thing as a mistake if it’s what we needed to learn more about our true selves and how we love. Yet of course, there will always be those loves we wish we could go back in time for, and just fix. Those ones with endings that were too painful for us to want to permanently write down as part of our past.
But regardless of how badly we wanted this love to be something other than what it was, it won’t change the harsh reality: we needed this love in our lives to break our hearts.
The absolute truth is, we need a big mistake to propel us towards the love of our life.
We have to fall apart in order to find out how we want to put ourselves back together.
This pain and suffering is what carves our way through to the love of our life that we find later.
One of the biggest mistakes we make in love is to persist in a relationship that we should have walked out of the moment we got into it. If not that, we must have gotten out of it long before we did and definitely not let it go all the way till it all went downhill.
However, this by no means suggest that, that love was meant to be forever – it was a time that made you realize what love really is.
We have all been in such relationships and we have all tried to mend the wounds, trying to somehow ensure that the love doesn’t end the way it did – but you must understand, you have very little to do with it. What’s meant to be, is meant to be.
But why does that love end in a catastrophe?
It does because it wants to shake you to your core and make you realize every belief you have about love.
Post this disaster (as you call it), you are meant to question what went wrong and you really would think hard about what love really is. The healing will never take a day – it is simply a matter of accepting the truth. You have healed, the day you have accepted the truth.
The day you accept the truth, you will know that you have your true love waiting out there in the world.
And this time – it will be different. You would be loved for who you are, you will be pushed to do what you really love to do and you will then turn around to realize that this is what you always were looking for.
The mistakes we make today are the ones that leave us better later. Sure, it hurts right now but tomorrow you will find something better because you will then know better what you are looking for.
You only get what you are looking for when you are ready. At the time of a broken hurt, don’t give up, embrace it.
The love you’d find forever will have no connection to all the old ones, it will feel different and that is exactly when you will know that you have achieved mending a broken hurt as a stronger person.
You will look within that love for the solitude and not chaos.
You will look for meaning and not what you think you want. You will have more comfort in being held, you will enjoy the conversations and you will pick being home with your beloved any day and that is the love when you will say yes.
It will make you realize how glad you are of making that mistake. You finally would know what matters to you and it will all follow like a river, calm and quiet.
Source: themindsjournal.com, peacequarters.com
When You Love Someone, You Stay Loyal To Them
When you genuinely love someone, you don’t hide your phone from them and text secretly as you are worried about what they might see on the screen. You don’t use fake names for your contacts nor delete messages so they cannot find anything. You don’t answer calls late in the night and lie about the person calling you.
When you love someone, you don’t even consider downloading Tinder or similar apps to flip through your options or see how many matches you will get to boost your confidence. You don’t even think about flirting with others, even if it is completely harmless.
When you love someone, you don’t act like you are single. You don’t give your phone number to people who are obviously interested in you. You don’t act in a way which suggests that you are available.
When you love someone, you don’t lose self-control! You don’t indulge in alcohol and use it as an excuse for cheating or flirting. You don’t communicate with your exes and look at them as a backup when your relationship comes to an end. You don’t give others a chance, although you are already in a relationship.
When you love someone, you don’t go to your ex whenever you have a tiny argument. You don’t jump in bed with the first person only because you are angry. You don’t destroy a serious relationship built on faith and trust for a night of distraction.
When you truly love someone, you don’t make them jealous by flirting with others, even if it is harmless and done only to see their reaction. You don’t call them weird or crazy for getting angry when you stare at others.
When you love someone, you don’t even consider cheating on your partner as an option, whether it is physical or emotional, in big ways or trivial ways. You don’t risk losing the person you have for something as insignificant as your libido. You don’t hurt them, no matter what!
When you love someone, you take your love seriously. You treat them nicely, with kindness and with respect.
When you love someone, you stay loyal to them at all costs. Here is what loyal truly means:
- Being loyal means never saying anything that would embarrass your partner in public
- Being loyal means keeping confidences!
- Being loyal means being fully respectful of your partner`s weakness and helping him/her to overcome them
- Being loyal means prioritizing your partner`s needs. Keeping them as primary over the needs of any other person
- Being loyal means constantly reminding your partner that you will be there physically and emotionally, whenever and wherever needed.
- Being loyal means keeping your word at all costs
- Being loyal means never speaking bad about you partner to others. You should share your frustrations and remarks with someone close, but without blaming the partner